Sunday, August 17, 2008

Vacationing by the Numbers

Days away from home: 15

Number of false starts from our house: 1 (We had to return to the house for Alex to pick tomatoes from our garden to take with us. Yes. He's just that crazy.)

Total miles driven: 2840.1

Hours it took us to drive the first 93 miles: 4 1/4 (How much Alex's blood pressure rose during that time? A lot.)

Number of children's books on tape I checked out from the library: 8

Number of children's books on tape that went unused after we discovered that our car's tape deck is jammed: 8

Number of times we watched Madagascar on the car DVD player: 10...maybe 11. Or 12.

Number of movies Alex and I saw in a real-live movie theater: 2 (The Dark Knight and Pineapple Express. Both highly (no pun intended) recommended. Thanks for the babysitting, Grandma.)

Traumatic head injuries: 1 (Suffered by Jack after he spun off of one of those metal merry-go-rounds they have at playgrounds. No worries. He's fine. And because the blood was on the back of his head, he couldn't see it, and therefore didn't freak out.)

Number of fish caught: <10

Bunches of seaweed caught: >30

Number of boats we saw on the lake near our cabin: Many

Number of non-motorized boats we saw on the lake, with the exception of our literally leaky rowboat: 1 (And that was our canoe. Fortunately not leaky.)

Before we got into the canoe, I asked Alex what he thought was the likelihood that the five of us would capsize. His estimate: 35%

After we all got into the canoe, I asked him again. His estimate this time: 45%

Number of wild bald eagles that I saw: 3

Number of times Alex had to tell me I was embarrassing him in front of the eagle: 1 (I almost capsized the rowboat by running from a spider.)

Number of men overboard: 0 (Thank God.)

Number of women overboard: 0 (Also thank God.)

Number of watches destroyed: 2 (Both mine. Both succumbed to different ailments—only one of which was my stupidity.)

Number of times I was accused of being a lollygagger for trying to sleep in or take a nap: At least 20. (Fortunately these sorts of insults have little impact on my ability to sleep.)

Number of pillows reclaimed from prior vacations: 1 (Two years ago we spent a night with K & E, Alex's Big Brother/Big Sister, in his hometown. I accidentally left my pillow there. While visiting them this time, Alex mortified me by bringing it up. E was able to immediately locate the pillow and forced us to take it with us.)

Total number of photos taken: 1153 (Clearly I have a problem. I promise not to make you look at all of them. Many of them are of largely unidentifiable frogs. I need a better camera. And a better editorial sense, apparently.)

Number of diapers or pull ups Quinn used on vacation: 0 (He decided the first night away from home that he was no longer interested in wearing pull ups at night. In case you're keeping track, that means that all three of my children are completely potty trained. Woo to the hoo! Although, weirdly, Quinn refuses to put on a swimsuit without a swim diaper.)

Number of phone messages waiting for us at home: 12

Number of those phone messages that were from our security company because our house-sitters set off our alarm: 3 (Fortunately our cop house-sitter was able to talk down the police officers who arrived at our house to investigate.)

Number of seconds it took the kids to turn on the Xbox after we got home: 4

Number of days without internet access: 8 (Aaaaaahhhhhh!)

Number of posts in my reader after those 8 days: 522

Number of work emails in my inbox: 293 (Fortunately, I was able to immediately delete without reading about 200 of those. I'm not looking forward to the other 93 though.)

Number of times in the first two days of vacation in which Quinn chanted, "Home! Home! Home! Go home!": 4

Number of times on our last day before embarking on the drive back home that Quinn informed us that he wanted to go home: 8

Likelihood that Quinn is a homebody: 96%

Number of days it is going to take me to recover from 15 days of vacation: 16


  1. Glad the vacation was awesome and you all made it back safely! I'm pretty jealous of the potty-training feat... if you're giving away pull-ups at Junk Pyramid I just might be interested (as long as you don't sneak that damn expired advantage in!)

  2. That's the perfect vacation with kids - well - except maybe for the blood! Sounds good to me!

  3. Days we missed you: 15.

    Times I clicked on your site to read vacation updates, "just in case": 20. At least. Glad you had a great time!

  4. I'm curious what happened that made it take 4 1/2 hours to go 93 miles. Or maybe I don't??

    Glad you're home.I'm always more exhausted once we return than I was when I left.

  5. Wow, I think I'm tired out just reading about your vacation. ;-)

    Welcome home!

  6. Congratulations on being diaper free! And bald eagles?!? Wow! Sounds like you had a great time but welcome home! Especially to Quinn!

  7. Great summary! Sounds like it was a lot of fun. I have one of those homebodies myself. But all three potty trained? I'm only just getting there with my 3 year old. Since I have two more coming up that is like my dream... Good to have you back.

  8. Thanks for the welcome home ladies! And, Mandy, I will be get ridding of a whole slew of diaper/pullup accessories soon. And I promise: no expired medicine.

  9. welcome back! I didn't blog about anything exciting while you were gone, as instructed! (Hope you don't mind I am blaming you for my lack of blogginess lately.)

  10. LOL, cute roundup. So are you taking bets on the number of days it will be before Quinn starts asking to go back?

  11. Love it! Especially the 'no pull-ups.' Now if you could only tell me your secret to success?
    Best wishes

  12. Sounds relaxing? Nevermind, with kids, relaxing vacation is an oxymoron.

    We just did a three day weekend and I won't be unraveled until at least next Friday.

    Congrats on the potty training. I pulled the trigger this week myself. No discussion just yet for fear of jinxing it.

  13. Your trip sounds awesome!

    That sucks about the tape deck, though. Some of our best vacation memories are the audio books we listened to there and back.

    (found you thru MotherBumper)

  14. No flippin way ! *I* was writing a post entitled ShallowGal's vacation by the numbers.

    Back to the drawing board

    xoxo, SG

  15. Welcome home! HilARious list babe. xoxo

  16. Only 16 days to recover?? Wow, that's impressive. It often takes me 16 days just to do the vacation laundry!

    Sounds like your blog readers appreciate more than your work does by the email responses!


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