Run Down

Wow. One wisdom tooth. It wonked me harder than I thought it would. Not pain or discomfort or bleeding, because that mostly got better in the first day or two, although my socket does get achy toward the end of the day.

But I have been so tired. I’m finding it hard to decide if it’s left over tiredness from the anesthesia, the Vicodin, and my recovery or if it’s just my regular tiredness that I finally have an excuse to indulge. I am currently so run down that finding a half hour or an hour to nap during the day no longer seems optional, but imperative.

Quinn has really been enjoying sitting on me and watching an episode of The Wonder Pets followed by an episode of Max and Ruby every afternoon while I lay down and rest. I’m not sure that’s normal. (The daily napping—I’m pretty sure toddler-love of The Wonder Pets and Max and Ruby is normal.)

I was so wearied this afternoon that I completely lost my cool with my kids—especially Jack, who chose today to not just be defiant about his homework, but to express his defiance about his homework. “Nothing can make me do my homework,” he repeated over and over.

See, he had to write sentences, and he doesn’t like to write sentences. If I had been more available, I might have tried to find a root of that. As it was, I ended up with my head in my hands and Jack ended up with tears streaking down his face as we sat at the table with unfinished homework in front of him.

Alex had planned to stay at work until late tonight to catch up on some work. But he came home and fed the little dudes the dinner that I made while I crammed in a quick nap. That hour I spent unconscious on the couch while he fed, bathed, and put the guys to bed saved me for all the work I have to do tonight—work I fell behind on while I was sleeping all weekend. Alex saved Team Stimey tonight, that’s for sure.

I’ll pull my shit together. I always do. But all I really have to say is that I am really looking forward to the day that all of my kids are in all-day school. I’m really looking forward to doing my work (and my napping) during the day, so I can be less run down after school and in the evening when they need me.

I also think it will be good for me and Alex. At night now he watches TV and the back of my head as I work away on the computer across the room. I’m looking forward to spending my evenings with him.

That day, when all of my kids are in school all day, is a long way away. Quinn won’t go to kindergarten until fall of 2010. I know I’ll still be busy then, and that all-day school is not the complete answer to my work at home mom/full-time stay at home mom problems. But I think it’s going to help.

I’m not sure where I was going with this long, rambling post that started in one place and ended up in another. I think it just kind of needed to come out. And mostly it’s a long way of saying that it’s hard to fit everything in, isn’t it?

24 thoughts on “Run Down

  1. I hate when I get so drained that just getting ready in the morning makes me tired. I hope your recovery goes quickly and that you are back to 100% very soon!

    BTW, thanks for visiting and commenting on my tackle in the midst of your tiredness. Take care. :)

  2. It really does make a difference when you have a full day break from the kids. You miss them, but you so much more energy for them. Since I work full time I can attest to this. At the end of a weekend day, I’m exhausted – and on the weekend, I have my husband at home to help! (sort of) My problem is that we get home so late in the evening (around 6-6:30), that everythign is rushed. I would love to work shorter days so I could actually make a “real” dinner, have time to play with them, sit together as a family and not go to bed SO LATE (my night owls go to bed between 8 and 9 p.m.). But I can’t force earlier bedtimes when they’re getting home so late…

    It’s all complicated. I have of yet to meet anyone who doesn’t feel overextended. And I suspect that those that don’t have far too much money for me to ever have an opportunity to meet them.

    And do you want to know that’s really “not normal”? I actually enjoy Wonder Pets and Max and Ruby now. Especially M&R – Max’s deadpan expressions just crack me up. See, I told you – not normal.

  3. For the uninitiated (as I have a 3-year old, so it’ll be a while before I have to tie him down to do homework), what would happen if you didn’t make sure your kids did their homework?
    I grew up in the Philippines and was pretty nerdy, but I did forget or choose not to do my homework often. Even when I knew it really counted (high school!). I accepted that it would ding my grade, but I’d usually have calculated that in and figure out how to make it up.

  4. I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling so tired and yucky! Hugs to you. I may not see you tomorrow (dentist appointments for the boys) so I will give you a hug on Friday and we can commiserate about balancing everything (and I can run by you wheather I should or should not work next year…I figure you don’t have enough to do, you should figure out my crap, too…hee heee heee…evil laughter) Goodnight, sleep tight!

  5. I was really looking forward to THAT day too. I had SIX MORE MONTHS. And here I go pulling my kid out of school next week. What a dumbass I am…but a loving, will do anything to give my kids a chance dumbass…a hoping this will work for our family dumbass…

    BTW, you’ve got just over one week to get your shit together. I wanna meet manic stimey, not rundown stimey. So get your game on or else… I will bring hamsters if I hafta.

    Oh, and I hope you feel better soon. Like, for real.

  6. I only have one child and no job and still it’s hard to fit it all in sometimes. And here I am wanting a job and thinking that working from home would be awesome. I was talking to another mom today and she said, “Kindergarten isn’t enough time, I need first grade.” Oh, how that worries me as first grade is years off. As in 2013. Oy.

  7. Augh, writing sentences! Is there any worse torture that teachers inflict on parents than that? And I’m serious here. Sentence writing has caused more melt-downs in this house than I even care to admit.

    I hope you’re back to your usual energy-filled self soon.

  8. Totally normal. And can I just say, there is no way I could have forced my red-headed daughter to write sentences in Kindergarten, and she has no confounding issues like autism. Even 1st grade was hard – she just wasn’t ready to focus that long. I still have nightmares about spelling packets and the Friday test. This kid is now pre-med in college.

  9. I sooooo identify with this whole post. Well, okay, I didn’t have my wisdom teeth out recently. Okay, fine, it was when I was twelve. But I identify with the homework and the stubbornness and the too tired to deal with finding the root of it and the eventual Fail result and the 2010 kindergarten.

  10. I totally understand…I’m a long way off to having both kids in school for a full day and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to go to the bathroom uninterreputed or actually complete a thought process until then…but I’m sure when the time comes I’ll really miss them… (or not!) I hope that you’ll soon feel more rested and that the homework battles will subside!

  11. I’m not sure that it’s just a matter of “pulling it together” when you’re recovering from surgery. I think you need to give yourself permission to snooze with Quinn watching TV. It doesn’t seem like you indulge yourself very much, and this nap is more of a necessity than an indulgence. Why not give yourself open permission to nap for a week, no hard feelings, and then re-assess and see how you feel.

  12. It’s not a big deal to take a nap while the kids watch some TV. Seriously. Stop being so hard on yourself!!!

    I think it’s probably everything catching up with you at once, and your body having something rudely yanked out was just the last straw. Plus, it’s February, and time to hibernate. I’m exhausted half the time myself, and there’s no reason at all.

    Fall of 2010 is only eighteen months away. You’ll get there!!!! For me, it seemed like kindergarten would NEVER get here, and now here it is, over halfway done. Sheesh. It kind of snuck up on me, in the end.

  13. I hear you sister. After much thinking, I think I’m going to resign before the summer. My job offered me a full-time position, but it’s too hard. I’d have to put the kids in before and after care, and I’ve missed so many field trips, assemblies, etc…while David is the one that is taking off to take care of the kids on the days that they have off, and I’m the one with the part-time job. I’m not quite talented as the multi-tasking moms that work. I have too much mommy guilt. And the inner office politics is crazy! So, as of June, I will be back to being a stay at home mom.

  14. Please tell us how you cook while napping? That’s impressive!

    Seriously, you are just wiped out. Maybe take a bit more of that Vicodin and get a good rest this weekend!

    You’ll be back next week, I’m convinced!

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