Piñata Update, Jack’s Party, and the Longest Well-Child Visit Ever

Oh, hi! How are you doing? It’s been a while. Have you lost weight?

I’ve spent the past several days attached to my computer and Final Cut, putting a DVD project together for a client. I haven’t responded to email, I haven’t read ANY of your insightful, hilarious, and heartfelt blog posts, nor have I done a very good job of parenting my children. But I’m back! And I have all kinds of news. Let’s see…

OH! Remember how I sent a super snarky email about my paper-stuffed piñata to the people at Oriental Trading and I was all, “What I’m gong to get with that email is ignored.”?

What it actually got me was a first-thing Monday morning call from a super nice lady named Andrea. She works for Oriental Trading and saw my media campaign against them and their paper-stuffed piñatas. She was kind enough to say nice things about my blog and to explain that most piñatas that come from Oriental Trading are not, in fact, stuffed with paper. She also took the charge for the piñata off of my credit card and told me that Oriental Trading very much cares about what its customers think and if people like their products.

And after their super fast response and my FREE! piñata, I believe them. Andrea told me that although she had seen my blog post, my email to customer service would have gotten attention too. Then she mentioned Big Brother and how they’re not really stalking me.

But then I got nervous and looked outside and there was a big, bright blue car parked behind a bush on my street, and I can’t be sure that it was the Oriental Trading Customer Service Team, but there were tufts of paper sticking out of the windows, so I’m pretty sure it was.

So I’ve started carrying a bat around with me.

*****

Jack’s party was a smashing success.

Alex thought he was acting out the printer scene from Office Space.
I saw more of a Rodney King thing.


Get it? Smashing? Like with the piñata? Ha, ha, ha, ha! I know. This is exactly the kind of thing you miss when I don’t write for a few days.

We were all about Frog and Toad at this party. Sam created all the decorations.

Yeah. That was ALL the decorations. We’re not extravagant.
Oh, we had a balloon too. That’s right: one balloon.
Don’t judge me.

But we did have these too:

They’re from this little company called Oriental Trading. Have you heard of them?

I had a whole bunch of activities planned. Of course what I didn’t have planned was when Jack’s friend found a KidzBop CD (the horror!) that McDonald’s snuck into or food bag the other day and she insisted that we play it. So…DANCE PARTY!

I know it looks like they’re trying to kill each other, but they’re actually dancing.

After I was able to restore order, we played a rousing game of Toad, Toad, Frog. (I wanted to play Frog, Frog, Toad, but Jack insisted on changing things up.) And then we used my awesome homemade lily pads to play Musical Lily Pads.

Then there was some more chaos and then we got out my craft activity that sounded like a way better idea when I thought it wasn’t going to be cold and rainy on party day. I’ll give you a hint: it involved kindergarteners and dirt. Which might have been better outside instead of on my dining room table, but whatever.

Jack really likes yellow dandelions and calls them Mary-golds, or Mary. So Quinn and I found marigolds that looked as much like dandelions as possible and we had the kids plant them in little pots they could decorate.

Sam is indicating he’s ready for a plant.

Jack is indicating that he likes glue.
We get lots of notes from the school about “inappropriate use of glue” and such.
Also, notice that horrible megaphone in the background.

What’s a party without cake? And, yes, I know there’s not a frog or a toad on there, but you try finding a Frog and Toad cake in the cake decor book at Giant. Because that’s the only place I get cake.

If you suggested that I bake something, you must be new here.


I know that you all just really want to know how the piñata went. It was a huge hit. (Oh, damn, I’m funny.)


It withstood a lot of beating too. After Alex went all crazy on it and the munchkins picked up every single item that had been inside, one kid made us tie it back up by its neck and then he beat it until the body dropped off.

We’re all about the gentle here.

Jack was ecstatic. So I consider the party a huge success.

*****

But what’s a birthday without an accompanying well-child doctor visit? Maybe the best part of the doctor’s appointment was when Jack got out of the car and barfed all over the parking lot. So much for well child. (Although I think he was just car sick.)

The second best part was when Quinn was in the middle of his four (!) immunizations and he sobbed out, “What’s taking so long?!” Poor guy.

I think we win for most epic appointment though. We were there for more than two hours. (Which is almost longer than this post. Almost.) Most of it wasn’t waiting time either. We got a lot of personalized attention. And we got the comfy chair room again.

You better believe they got a hefty ice cream reward after all that though.

*****

Don’t you kind of wish that I’d been writing all week instead of saving it all up for today? I’m done. I promise.

29 thoughts on “Piñata Update, Jack’s Party, and the Longest Well-Child Visit Ever

  1. Wow … you sure got attention! I can’t believe they read the blog. I mean, er, um, well, you know what I mean!

    Jack’s expression with the pinata is priceless.

  2. Thank goodness you are back. I was going through Stimeywithdrawal…had the shakes and everything. Glad the puke occured outside of the car and not in it’s usual spot..inside the car. See you Friday for pj day.

  3. I had been waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting for this post and I tried my very best not to nag. Thanks. It was great.
    L

  4. Well worth the wait. And kidz bop. Ugh. Let the kids sing then instead of the adults. Though I feel bad that some of those people have to claim that they are Kidz bop singers… I think the James Blunt redo is the worst ever. *shiver*

  5. That wasn’t the OTC outside your house. That was me! Ahahahahahaha!

    Um. Anyway. I kind of think our kids need to hang out together. Joseph and Jack and have a field day with glue. Elle and Quinn can be loud and quirky together. Sam can …. I don’t know, help me in the garden or something.

  6. So a cake suggestion (I know, a little late) – you could have asked the bakery to do like a pond/jungle type back ground and just stuck the little plastic frogs on it that you get in a big bag for cheap from any party store/Walmart on top of the cake.

    I’ve almost never used a cake we just ordered out of the party book at the local grocery store (remind me to tell you about how I forgot to buy Meenie her first birthday cake. I remembered the night before. Parenting FAIL!)

  7. Thought of you guys as we partied this weekend. I was tempted to look for a horse pinata, but decided that she would cry if we beat the paper, err, candy out of the thing. Hope you have some less busy ahead of you this weekend!

  8. I wrote a post awhile back about Comcast and the next day I got an email from the head of Customer relations for Comcast.

    A blog is a powerful thing.

  9. Oh I’ve missed you! Glad to know the birthday party was a smashing success! I’m now sorta scared of Oriental Trading and promise I will blog any mishaps in the future just to see if their customer service is paying attention!

  10. Good for you with the blogging about OT. I’ve tweeted about problems with good results from companies on twitter. @Leapfrog is especially responsive.

    I’m OK with KidzBp. Not crazy about the z in Kids. Is the z to make it seem more fun! I rather think not — in my opinion.

  11. I love pinatas! Best party activity.

    I just took Oliver to the doctor for his 4 year check up and he had to get a shot for the first time in two years. I felt so bad for him. He loves the doctor, but this time he had to sit through a lot of boring talk about his recent diagnosis (which I’m sure he understood far too well – but what can you do?) and then he was jabbed with a spike.

    Luckily, they get over things quickly.

  12. So there is someone from Oriental Trading Co whose job is to do blog searches and see if anyone mentioned their company? I wonder if it works both ways… if you write something good about them, will they send you free stuff to thank you?

  13. I’m not sure I’ve ever heard your friend L curse before. She’s always struck me as the non-cursing kind. Oh, and I made up a new phrase “Pulled a stimey.” It’s when you have someone over to your house to visit and you offer them some of your clutter and they take it. Not that you’ve ever done that to me, but in the early days of The Junk Pyramid I think you wrote about doing that a couple times.

  14. Yes, this post was worth the wait. Hilarious!

    but where are the pictures of the kids beating the frog until the body fell apart? :)

    and hooray for Oriental trading company—even it is slightly big brother-like!

  15. I’ve got those damned Kidz Bop CDs in my car. Luckily, they prefer They Might Be Giants.

    Pinatas always strike (heh) me as odd. “Hey kids, we’re gonna get a stick and beat the living crap out of a beloved character until candy falls out!”

    Good for Oriental Trading! I wonder if Andrea’s assigned to Google searches?

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