It’s Thursday, which means that Jack and Sam’s friend E comes over to play with her little brother P. Today, our other first grade neighbor, V, and her babysitter, S, came too. (Do you have that straight? )
Things were going well until E mentioned that she wanted to marry Jack. Which I love because I love anyone who loves Jack. E had even found a couple of costume jewelry rings for them to wear. Well, Sam was not okay with this because evidently at the beginning of the year, E had promised Sam that she would marry him.
Five minutes later Sam was upstairs sobbing, E was confused, and Jack was oblivious to the whole thing. In fact, after the nuptials, Jack passed his ring over to V’s babysitter. I’m not sure if that makes Jack and the babysitter married or E and the babysitter married. Either way, it didn’t matter to Sam.
I know that Cliff Huxtable would have handled this in a very after-school special sort of way, so I headed up the stairs to have a heart to heart conversation with Sam about love. Unfortunately, Sam isn’t Theo Huxtable. Sam reacts to disappointment by withdrawing and screaming about wanting to be alone. He won’t even let me hug him to comfort him.
In my infinite wisdom, I decided that adding E to the situation was the way to handle it. But after Sam yelled at her for breaking her promise, she started sobbing. Nicely done, Stimey. Now, not only was Sam heartbroken and angry, but E was convinced that Sam would never talk to her again.
I am an excellent playdate facilitator.
More drama ensued with E swearing that original promise took place in kindergarten and that it didn’t count, because, you know, kindergarten, c’mon. Then there was some passing of notes written in marker on Kleenex and some more crying, and then E’s dad showed up and everyone went home, but not before E very dramatically removed her ring and handed it to me.
If this is age 8, what the hell is age 16 going to be like?