You know what’s far away from my house? Jamestown. Like, multiple hours from my house far away.

Luckily, Team Stimey had a stop en route to pick up Joeymom, Joey, and Andy. Then we drove for, like, ten more hours to get to Jamestown. Happily, Joeymom, et al, so generously had wrapped-up Zhu Zhu pet gifts for my kids, which made them so happy for the duration of the ride. (And the visit to Jamestown, and the ride home, and every second since. Thank you, Joeymom!!)

Incidentally, do you have any idea how loud six Zhu Zhu pets in a minivan can be? (Answer: Loud. And squeaky.)

Our triumphant arrival at Jamestown.

Also, does anyone other than me try to substitute “Jonestown” for “Jamestown”? They are totally not the same thing. Although I don’t think I would have wanted to live in either place.

We started at the far end of Jamestown at Joeymom’s suggestion, which I think was brilliant. It was also the hottest end of Jamestown, it being about 99 degrees. Joey kept claiming that it was somewhere between 192 and 196 degrees, but I think he was off by a little.

If you’re not familiar with Jamestown, there is a museum, some ships to explore, an Indian village, and the Jamestown Fort, with lots of buildings to check out.

Does it look hot to you by any chance?

Everything there was really cool and kind of makes you think about how badass the colonists were. Let’s not even talk about winter, which must have been horrible. Let’s talk about summer when it was eight million degrees and there was no air conditioning, and probably a fire burning in every house. I wouldn’t have made it. I probably would have spent the summer sitting in the water on the beach whining and then a crocodile would’ve gotten me. Or tiny fishes, whatever.

Sure, half of the residents of Jamestown died and all, but those mofos who lived? Bad. Ass.

No matter how sucky it would have been to actually live at Jamestown though, it would have been even suckier to spend four months on a relatively tiny boat getting there.

Honestly, I probably would have jumped overboard during week two and tried to swim for land. And then a shark would have gotten me.

Have I mentioned that I have a little bit of a phobia about things that Lurk in the water?

Sam found his dream weapon on one of the ships.

It turns out that most of the people on the ships just laid their mats on top of the cargo and slept there, but a select few got bunks. Quinn really, really liked the bunks. I think he might have climbed in every one.

At least he remembered to take off his shoes.

I think I might have been in the hold when I took this one.

Hi, Sam!

Quinn kind of took the cake for me today. He cracks me up so much just by being him.

It was hot, okay?

And then the Zhu Zhu got hot.

One of the buildings at the fort was a church. Joeymom asked Sam what kind of building he thought it was and he was all, “A church?” And I was all, “How do you think Sam learned about what churches look like?”

Quinn continued to amuse.

This is what I imagine people (like me) sitting in churches would feel like.

I’ve clearly trained him well in the art of posing though.

No trip to Jamestown is complete without a historical re-enactment of the trip from England to Virginia though.

Preferably with Zhu Zhu pets as ships.

Our intrepid explorer sets off!

And then another. Two comes right after one!

Land ho! And a mourning period for Quinn’s Zhu Zhu, lost at sea.

There you have Camp Stimey’s trip to Jamestown. Oh, except for the 16-hour drive home. (Okay, I exaggerate.) At least I had the awesome Joeymom to chat with for a big chunk of the way. It was a good, if hot, day.

I also picked up a little something in the gift shop for tomorrow’s Colonial, oh let’s just call it Jamestown Week activity.

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