Wednesday, September 21, 2011

What Happened to Alex on the Way to Work

Alex called me at about 11 a.m. this morning to tell me how his commute went. Evidently it did not go well.

He started by saying, "I came around a corner and there was some sort of creature in the road..."

My mind's eye immediately conjured up this:

Creature = Yeti, right?

"So I swerved," Alex continued...

Meanwhile, my mind's eye was busy rejecting the Yeti as too unrealistic. But what kind of creature could cause Alex to swerve out of control?

This was supposed to be a bear. But I can't draw a bear.

I interrupted Alex to ask him if he was okay. It seemed like the considerate thing to ask at this point in the conversation. Dude's fine.

My mind's eye:

I know. Über-realistic this time.

Of course, by this point, I was deadly curious to know what giant and exotic animal had NEARLY DESTROYED ALEX.

My mind's eye: A deer. I really did imagine a deer. It seemed likely.

I was wrong. The "creature" that caused Alex to swerve?

But we have a deal with the squirrels!

I know. I lost a little respect for Alex too. I love squirrels as much as the next guy, probably more (probably A LOT more), but you don't swerve for them. Duh.

Anywho, then Alex said that the car seems to be fine, except he blew out a tire on the curb or something. And he lost a little bit of dignity.

That's one jerky little squirrel.

Here's the thing about Alex and the reason he called though. I don't think it was for my special brand of patented Stimey support. (Although I can't imagine why not.) It was for this:
Guess where I'm spending my day tomorrow?

Motherfucking squirrels.

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