Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Tidbits From Prison

Today Team Stimey went to Alcatraz. I had a scenario in my head where we would end up on the news when Jack turned out to be the only person to disappear from the island and mysteriously appear on the mainland, but in fact no one fell in the Bay and everyone stuck close together and only Quinn was so whiny that we considered leaving him in a jail cell.

It was like we were a normal family.

Well, except for all the spinning through the corridors and the physical restraint of one kid *cough*Jack*cough* who had determined that the instructions coming from his audio tour were more important than the instructions coming from his parents. Also, the lady taking photographs of her stuffed mouse.

Speaking of Algernon, he went missing this morning. Everybody put on a brave face, but some of us were busy mentally creating missing posters that would unfortunately have to read, "Last seen wearing an onion ring."

It's possible he was trying to escape.

The truth is that we all thought Algernon was gone for good, but everyone was trying to make sure that his disappearance wouldn't wreck our trip to prison. Then, after we parked the car before our tour, Jack gave me a hug, which involved his putting his hand into my sweatshirt pocket, and he suddenly had Algernon and we were joyous and the rest of the day was wonderful. Also, I've provided a monetary reward to Jack.

I know that I've been a little Algernon-heavy here lately and for that, I apologize. I promise to not only write about and post photos of him for the rest of time. In fact, I took something close to sixty billion photographs of seagulls today, so maybe I'll tell you about those guys instead.

Like this angry fellow.

I mean, I guess I could write about Team Stimey itself, but that seems so...obvious.

Also, I'm tired, so for now I'll just tell you that my kids are troopers, I've entirely given up trying to feed them nutritious food on this trip and we have moved to an all-dessert diet, and even though this next photo is not very good, it features all three kids and prison bars, so Imma share it with you.

Also, I had to sacrifice my sweatshirt to Sam. *sulk*

Tomorrow we are thinking about walking the Golden Gate Bridge. Keep your fingers crossed that no one gets run down by unruly tourists on rental bikes.


I haven't yet told you about our trip to get out here. Guess what, friends? We almoooooost got here without anyone barfing. (Sam, upon landing.) Naturally, this not entirely disastrous flight gave me the hubris to consider myself qualified to offer tips for flying with children. You can find them over at White Knuckle Parenting.


  1. Nice! I'm kinda envious... can't even take mine to the park for 20 minutes without some kinda catastrophe... glad Algernon turned up un-squished :)

  2. Love the onion ring pic. Am considering kidnapping the little guy just to see the posters.

  3. Oh, well, the park. That's a whole different story. We have disasters there all the time. And this morning, we had two meltdowns from two different kids before we managed to get out of our hotel room, so I take my victories where I can get them!

  4. I love the Bay area! Are you venturing up the coast at all or just staying in the SF area? I feel like I should know this after reading your blog for a few years but, how does Team Stimey do at the beach?

  5. San Fran is, literally, my favorite city in the whole world and I'm so jealous.

  6. Serious San Fran envy here. Have you taken the team to the Cliff House? The food is great and there are seals on the rocks below. Seals!

  7. Algernon with the onion ring beats Algernon with the glow stick around his neck.
    That bird scares the crap out of me. Isn't there a movie with birds like that?

  8. So happy to hear about you in my neck of the woods, even if I don't get to actually see you. How long are you hear for? I've lived here nearly my whole life and been to Alcatraz maybe twice, both taking visitors from out of town. We're taking my kids this Sunday thought, day in SF before they start school. Mmm...onion rings :)

  9. At first, I thought that was an eagle. Clearly I am not a biologist. :)
    Also, yes, there was a really old movie called The Birds?

  10. Here through Monday morning. It's funny, because I'm the same way about DC. I never go to the fun places unless someone visits. Also, I lived in the Bay Area for a decade and this was my first time to Alcatraz. Funny, huh?

  11. Yeah, that bird was all, "The fuck you want?"

  12. Ha! Not an eagle. And I think The Birds had crow-like creatures, which are even scarier than gulls.

  13. It's totally a good city. But the traffic! Oy.

  14. Aw, thanks! The bird is pretty cute too.

  15. We do great at the beach! My kids love it! I kind of hate it because I have issues with sand and saltwater, but my opinion tends to not matter much in these kinds of things. Kids trump me. :)


Thanks for commenting! May you be visited by unicorns and kittens.