Monday, December 31, 2012

I Hate New Year’s Eve

I feel like I should write something for New Year’s Eve because everyone is all over Facebook and stuff being all, “Grateful for family and friends! I hope 2013 is awesome for everyone!” and I’m like, “That is nice and all, but I just really need this night to be over so everyone can just chill the fuck out and stop being loud and obnoxious.”

See, I’m in New York, which is maybe the dumbest place to spend New Year’s Eve if you hate people and hate noise because you have to accept that people are going to be loud and you’re the asshole if you call the front desk over and over to complain about noise on the biggest party night of the year. Even I get that.

Alex is at a concert and I am tapping my foot impatiently waiting for the movie my kids are watching on TV to be over so I can make them go to bed and I can put on headphones and a movie and block out all the noise of younger, more fun people.

I figure that I’ll at least have a few hours of quiet when everyone is out partying, right?

New York is nice and all, but I don’t know how people live here. I would be the biggest ball of stress you ever saw. We’ve had a really fun vacation, but I am rapidly losing my ability to cope. I can’t wait to be back in my house, where I control who shares walls with me and the most obnoxious thing I have to contend with is Alex’s continued insistence on breathing when he sleeps.

Have a wonderful New Year! I am very grateful for all of my friends and family and I hope that 2013 is the best year yet for all of you.

But, fuck, let’s just get this night over with, okay?

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