Thursday, September 5, 2013

Issy


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I’ve written and deleted so many words about Issy Stapleton and her mother today. I can’t stop thinking about them. What it comes down to is this:

Issy: I am so sorry the person you probably trusted most in the world did this to you.
Parents: I know that they system is broken. I know it is all but impossible to get what you need for your child and your family. But the decision to kill your child because you think she would be better off dead? That is not your decision to make.
I wish I knew how to make this stop. I wish I knew what to say to desperate parents. I wish I had a way to finish the sentence, “If you ever get to the place where you think the answer is to murder your child, you should __________,” but I don’t have one. I wish I could end that sentence with, “call 911 and they will make your child safe until you can be there for her again.”

Unfortunately, there is no fix-all solution when it feels hopeless. There is no answer except to keep putting one foot in front of the other. There is no answer other than trying to reach out to someone—anyone—who can keep your child safe. There is no answer other than remembering how much you love your child and understanding that self-determination is theirs.

There is no way to finish that sentence except to say, “If you ever get to the place where you think the answer is to murder your child, you should stop.

I’m so sorry this happened to you, Issy.

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