Captain Stimey: Lord of Boring

Hi, friends! I’ve been doing a terrible job of writing twice a week, but I have a perfectly cromulent reason and that is because I have not a lot going on.

Pretty much all I do these days other than parent and go to work is run. Based on the way Alex’s eyes glaze over when I detail my runs to him, mile by mile, I’m starting to think that juuuust maaaaybe the minutiae of my runs is less interesting to non-Stimey individuals. I’m really just looking out for you by not writing about it.

Buuut…I’m a runner and evidently it’s a rule of running that you have to write about your training or it didn’t happen. This was a tough week for it though. On Sunday, I ate a lot of cheese and then went running, which isn’t the greatest combination. The next day, Quinn informed me that I had been “crabby” after my run and that I had been suffering from “cheese fatigue,” and now that’s a Thing at my house. Also, I learned not to eat a lot of habanero colby cheese before lacing up.

I also took two runs in the rain, which was actually kind of refreshing. I took one of those rain runs around Jack’s school before I picked him up from an after-school activity. On the way home we saw this other guy out running. I was all, “Huh, Jack, I thought I was hardcore for running in the heavy rain until I saw that guy pushing a double stroller, running uphill.” Jack stopped, looked at the guy, checked my jacket and long pants, and agreed, “Yeah, and he’s only wearing shorts and a t-shirt.”

Nothing like kids to keep you humble.

Photo of me after a run. I'm wet and wearing a green visor from which you can see water dripping.

I took this picture on my less rainy run to show my mom how awesome I was for going running in the rain. I’m not sure she was totally as impressed as I’d hoped.

Then today I ran 9.17 miles and, yes, I’m going to be that precise because those last couple miles I fought for every one of those hundredths of a mile. Also, I live at the top of a hill, so every single run I take that ends at my house finishes with a half mile up a fucking hill. It sucks. But it’s making me tough, I guess.

^ And that was me NOT talking about running. Consider yourselves lucky.

Hmmm. What else? Oh! Oh! A while back I started reading the Game of Thrones series and I am happy to report that I finished the first book today. Do you know how long it takes to read an 807-page book in 25-minute increments on the Metro to and from work?

*searches Facebook to see how long ago she posted about starting to read the series*

Oh, God. It took four months. Well now I’m embarrassed.

Screenshot of my November 7 Facebook status. It is a photo of "A Game of Thrones." The text is "I've made the decision to start reading the Game of Thrones series. It feels like a big commitment--like, I chose to get married, I chose to have kids, I chose to commit myself to 5,000 pages of reading material. ‪#‎stillhaventwatchedthetvshow‬ ‪#‎iamonpage13‬ ‪#‎seeyouinsixmonths‬"

Guess I was overly optimistic.

I’m loving it though. I just need to figure out how to sit down with a book on my lap without falling asleep. It doesn’t matter what book it is, if I sit down and stare at a page, I fall asleep.

Oh! So, I know this is about a decade later than everyone else in America, but my family has started shopping at Whole Foods. See, I made the mistake of watching a documentary about the food production industry and I started feeling really bad about the farmers and the animals. It was like a repeat of when I read Fast Food Nation a decade ago, but now we can afford to buy meat from farmer’s markets and Whole Foods, so that’s what we started doing.

I mention this not to be all, “I AM A GOOD PERSON,” but instead to be like, “ALEX AND I ARE NOT GOOD AT CHANGE.”

On our first dual trip there, we seriously had a whisper-shouted fight between the dairy and meat sections because we were so overwhelmed by the unfamiliar foods and the packaging with its muted colors and the damn omelet bar in the deli section. If you were at the Rockville Whole Foods on Valentine’s Day, we were the couple that nearly had a fist fight and abandoned a cart next to the chicken refrigerator.

Well. This has turned into kind of an embarrassing post. And that’s without even mentioning my trip this morning to get my driver’s license renewed only to find out that said license is good until 2021 and it’s actually Alex that needs to renew his.

I think I’ll stop here before I embarrass myself more or bore you more. Captain Stimey, signing off.

8 thoughts on “Captain Stimey: Lord of Boring

  1. Your mother was totally impressed with that run. And the very cute picture that went with it. Also, this post is not boring at all, Captain S.

  2. I’m impressed as hell with that run. I hate the uphill run.
    Game of Thrones is an excellent book series, but not a good TV series to watch with your 17 yr old son and his friends. Thus, I have not watched past the beginning of the first episode.

  3. Yay for running victories big and small and cheesy!

    The first rule of marital harmony at Whole Foods is never to step into a freaking Whole Foods–the only store that T. has ever begged me to leave without paying for my goods. Three words: Mom’s Organic Market. Cheaper, local, and better quality goods than Whole Foods, without the price-fixing scandals, asparagus water, and artisan goat cheese made by prisoners earning 74 cents a day. The store is welcoming and comfortable; unlike at WF, I don’t feel as though my usual level of slovenly dress is a barrier to entry. Their meat section isn’t great, but they are fantastic for local milk and eggs, bulk goods, coffee, organic pantry items, and some fruits and veggies. I get organic chicken and ground beef from Costco. I also eat a good deal of Australian/New Zealand lamb, almost all of which is free range/grassfed (unlike U.S. lamb, which is usually grainfed in feedlots). I still don’t have a good non-WF source of pork, though.

    For half of the year (May-November) I get most of my fruit and vegetables, as well as my eggs, from a CSA–you might want to look into joining one. My CSA (Norman’s Farm Market) has also just started offering a meat share in addition to the produce/egg share, although I haven’t sampled it. I’ve loved having a CSA membership–it’s exposed us to a lot of great, really delicious produce we’d never have tried otherwise–but having one does force you to be creative and flexible in your cooking. I’ve only had one spectacular CSA failure: cardoons. (We never speak of cardoon day in our house.)

    I’ve been thinking of reading the Game of Thrones series but have been shying away from the commitment. You’re inspiring me to give it a try.

    • Ah, I forgot that a few of my more highly evolved friends have been trying to get me to join the Polyface Yum buying club ( They sell local, humanely raised beef, pork, poultry, and eggs that you order in advance; you then pick up your order of frozen meat at a designated pickup spot once every 5 weeks. I like that you can order as little or as much as you want, but I haven’t gone all in with them because the availability of particular cuts of meat can be a little spotty. It might be worth checking out, though, if it’ll preserve your marital bliss.

  4. I don’t know if it would help, but maybe listen to the GoT books by audio? I could see future books being very frustrating in 25-minute chunks. I got frustrated and I read big! And, put the kids to bed and watch the series – so good, if sexy and violent.

    Maybe try the organics at Wegman’s in Germantown? I find them so much more approachable! Plus the hot bar is amazing.

    Wish I could run! We walked 3 miles at the Ntl Zoo today and I need a nap!

  5. I’m not a runner, but I’ve been walking a lot and have PR’d a few times and my hubz is all yeah, whatevs….Great job on those runs!! I’m impressed…even if Jack wasn’t. :)

    GoT is a great series of books. The fourth one is a little rambly, but the fifth is excellent. Enjoy!!

    Whole Foods scares me. Not gonna lie. I’m very overwhelmed when I go in there. Thankfully our local store has a fantastic selection of organic and humanely raised meat and such.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *