Thursday, October 18, 2007

The Unhappy Homemaker

I have lost all interest in being a homemaker.

That is, if I ever had any interest to begin with.

As I type, I am preparing frozen pizza for my children for the second time this week. Granted, it is one of the few dinners that all three of them will eat. It is not unusual for all three children to burst into tears when they come to the dinner table and see the food I have lovingly prepared for them. It's a real morale booster. At least with the pizza I know they won't go to bed hungry. I mean, really, I'm not sure how they can stand to never eat dinner. I'd be starving all night.

So, yeah, I don't seem to cook anymore.

And cleaning? I clean if I know someone is coming over. Wait, change that: I clean if I know someone I don't know well is coming over. You folks that are here regularly and that I used to clean for? Yeah, I'm done with that. You're welcome to see the furballs in my living room and the food crumbs on my kitchen floor.

There was one particularly egregious incident last week when there was a one-year-old baby eating off of my tablecloth. Based on the number of crumbs on it, it probably looked dirtier than the floor. (Her mom comes over a lot, so I didn't clean in advance.) Embarrassed, I pulled the tablecloth off only to be confronted by the bottom-of-the-tablecloth fuzz that was adhered to the table by some unknown sticky substance.

I already do such a poor job at laundry that my husband started his own laundry system. He does all of it now. Perhaps if I just let it all go a little more, he'll develop more of his "systems" for other chores too.

My kids are not on a nightly bath schedule anymore. Not by a long shot. I do manage to get their teeth brushed at least. Although I'm not sure why, seeing as how they don't eat.

Wait, I just thought of a positive: The iRobot people sent me a new Scooba to replace my broke-ass one so at least I can clean my floors again without having to mop. Although all that moving of chairs and pushing the button to turn it on sure seems like a lot of work.

Now that my kids are in school, I have more time to clean, cook, work, nap (!!!) than I have had in six years. But I've lost my homemaker mojo. I'm not entirely convinced that I want it back, but I feel that it's important, if only to keep social services at bay, to at least keep up appearances.


  1. I don't like unloading the dishwasher, so my dishes will pile up until we have nothing left to use. Luckily the kids are older now and so I pay them to empty it. What is Alex's strategy for laundry? I would like to implement that system with Jason. Think it will work?
    There must be something in the air today regarding housework, because to avoid doing mine, I went and helped a friend clean her basement. I know, I need help.


  2. It's a great system, actually. He puts it in the washing machine first thing when he gets up. Then he puts it in the dryer before he goes to work. Then he folds it every couple weeks or so.

    I guess there may be a couple kinks to work out. :)

    Good luck with Jason.

  3. Never developed the gene apparently - much less a system. And I have resigned myself to the idea that it's just too freakin' late for me. :(

  4. Never developed the gene apparently - much less a system. And I have resigned myself to the idea that it's just too freakin' late for me. :(

  5. anne at annenahm.comOctober 19, 2007 at 11:57 AM

    Sounds like you are in mommy rehab. Just work the process, master your ass, *insert motivational slogan for taking it easy* and it will settle out.

    Or you know, CPS will show up and fine you for not taking proper care of the cockroaches.

  6. I'm trying the Flylady approach right now. ( but I tell ya, I'm just not motivated. I used to have the cleanest most organized house B.K.(Before Kids). Now it's the last thing I want to do. I'm either busy with the kids or when I'm not, I want time to myself. If you come up with a magic solution, please pass it on.

  7. I don't have a personal chef, housekeeper or personal manager, but it seems the perfect solution to me. Maybe we should do some in depth research?

  8. Cleaning really is a pain in the behind

  9. Sorry. i;m using the same "system" you are. My house is in a contstant state of tornado-ripped-through-war-zone look. The original "shabby chic."

  10. Nope. No system here. But I'm thinking we need a top-to-bottom fumigation because we've all been sick since school started, and I'm starting to believe we've gotten the house sick.

  11. Good God -- I could have written this post. I have totally given up on household chores, even though I have more time to do them than ever before. My husband has started to do the laundry out of desperation.

    What's happening to us?

  12. Glad I'm not alone. Housework sucks. I like the idea of just calling my house shabby chic and leaving it at that.

  13. Just taking a quick break from my blog-break. I very vaguely remember some sort of saying about housework going around among early seventies radical feminists which just shows how mean and arrogant they/we could be, but it might be worth dusting off on this occasion: Housework is for women who have nothing better to do. The women who loved this saying the most were of course the most hopeless of housekeepers, like myself.

  14. I can totally sympathise with you. I just hate it. B.C. (before children) I was fanatical about housework but now, what the heck. It all gets messed up again as soon as my children all pile in from school. The dog sheds hair all day and my husband has developed a very irritating habit of leaving bits of clothing lying all over the house!!! I live in an all male household and I'm determined that my boys are not going to grow up expecting 'the little woman' to do everything!! So, I do nothing (that's not quite true - I moan at them alot). Not sure it's really working though as the mess really doesn't seem to perturb them in the slightest!

    Catherine x

  15. Ooh, Catherine, I love that. I'm not slacking, I'm teaching!

    Good to hear from you, TIV!

  16. I have the flylady system...went so far as having lists made out for what is supposed to get done on each day. True to my typical self, I'm all about planning the system and none about using the said system.

    Hubby's laundry system is like yours, but he just dumps the dry clothes on what we call the "laundry couch" and there they sit until we have a guest who requires a place to sit down. My boys are going to really tick off their future wives since they think you get your clothes from a couch. (That's how it worked at Hubby's house, so I have no doubts that the laundry couch syndrome is genetic.)

  17. I'm like you, Ange. I made up all the lists for Flylady because I love to organize. but when it came to the actual cleaning? Not so much. I hope it works better for Kelly.


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